Wednesday, December 1, 2010

I'm So Determined To Do This...Again

A few days ago I was reading about the benefits of breastfeeding. It's not new information to me because I've researched it before while I was pregnant. When I was done re-reading I felt so guilty and selfish for not continuing to breastfeed my girls. It took me so long to start in the first place and then I threw all that hard work away. I didn't have the support I needed while I was in NY. With Mimi at home and Sasa in the hospital I couldn't breastfeed one and pump for the other and still cook and clean. So, formula took over. I felt guilty for it then and I feel the same now. That night I started to pump again. I'm so determined to give my girls breast milk again. It's so good for them! Especially since Sasa is still on oxygen, I think the nutrition form my milk will help her heal better.

I'm really kicking myself in the butt about this. Why did I stop? My decision was justified because I really couldn't do it all, but I could have let something else go instead of breastfeeding. the lesson I've learned, go with my gut. If I had paid attention to that guilty feeling, I would've figured out a way to keep pumping for the girls. Well, you live and you learn. Wish me luck on relactation!


  1. Good Luck!! It really is the best thing for your baby, if you can. Sometimes for one reason or another moms can't, and that's ok too.

    But I wish you much luck for you and your little ladies {{hugs}}

  2. I don't know anything about trying to start it up again...but I applaud you for your efforts. I don't think that you should ever feel guilty for doing what is best for your family at that time...but it's great that you've recognized all of the beautiful and plentiful benefits of breastfeeding. Believing in God as you so strongly really is quite miraculous that our bodies are equipped with what is best for our babies so long after they've left our bodies!! I wish you much success... and by the way, when do I get to meet them?? :-) Lydia is so into her baby friends!

  3. Don't become discouraged if it takes a bit of time! I would suggest getting a Medela SNS if you do not have one already. Using this supplementer you are able to feed your girls right at your breast, using whatever formula you had switched to and it will stimulate your body to produce milk as they "nurse". I used it while I was working on some breastfeeding issues years ago and LOVED it.
    Here is a link, though I'm sure you can find it other places as well.

  4. Have you met with a lactation consultant? That's what you really need!

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